April 21, 2022

Happy May to you all!

I don’t know about you, but my head is absolutely spinning! It seems as if the whole world is changing, doesn’t it?

I think for me, with everything in the world seeming to be upside down, my brain is struggling even more with the fact that everything in my personal life seems upside down right now, too. It’s not the rainy season bringing on millions of flying termites (thousands of which ended up in my house last night including in Chloe’s bed…); it’s not the monkeys and baboons finding their way into my kitchen to steal food; it’s not the electricity going on and off that makes my brain hurt…. No, it’s transition, chaos, colors, sounds, waiting, not being able to talk about things, and sometimes not feeling heard that short-circuits my brain. Bring on the baboons, the monkeys, and the termites…but give me familiar surroundings; colors that don’t hurt my brain; and people who hear me, know me, understand me, and will pray with me. In the midst of total chaos, this is what my soul longs for.

As you probably know, Roger, Chloe, and I are not currently in Kitale. But if you read Roger’s newsletters, you already know that; so, instead of reiterating all of that story, I’ll share with you how Chloe and I are doing in all of this.

Chloe has both really struggled with this transition and greatly benefited from it. She is seeing an American occupational therapist here in Kijabe who is absolutely wonderful with our whole family. The first couple of weeks we were here, Chloe fell down the steps in the house (not all the way) three times, she threw something out of anger and shattered a large, beautiful bathroom mirror (which doesn’t belong to us), she began wetting the bed nightly, and she regressed to a lot of mal-adaptive behaviors because everything was new and scary to her. Three months later though, her core strength has noticeably improved; she’s able to take long walks with us; she’s playing outside more; she’s showing a lot more maturity in her conversations with me, and she is trying her best to regulate her emotions and reactions to things (something Luke – the OT – said would likely happen as she becomes more capable and independent as a result of OT).

But OT takes years of work, and it is only one of many things she needs. We are asking God to provide a support worker (preferably from the US) who can come for a year and work with Chloe on a daily basis – which would also provide Roger and I with a break from being her caregivers 24/7/365. As brilliant, funny, sweet, and compassionate as she is, it’s a well-known fact that of all the special needs which children face, autism is one of the most difficult on the family as a whole. The marriage failure rate of families with autistic children is 80%. That’s scary high. So, it’s really important to be in a location where not only is Roger able to minister and do church planting, but also where our whole family can get the support and care (physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally) we need.

The transition hasn’t been easy on any of us. It’s difficult (though much appreciated) to live in someone else’s home surrounded by unfamiliar things and colors…having to be even MORE hyper-vigilant that things don’t get broken or ruined. It’s difficult learning how to manage a household with the nearest grocery store an hour away…learning new people and new people learning about us and Chloe…figuring out how to fit into a new community. But truly, any difficulty is worth getting the help Chloe and we need, especially since we can’t bring her back to the US.

But there is also amazing beauty and peacefulness here. The view of the Rift Valley and the surrounding mountains (including a beautiful dormant shield volcano called Mt. Longonot) has always been a visual balm to my soul. The streets are quiet without the traffic and the motorcycle taxis of Kitale. I feel safe to walk, am surrounded by the Kijabe forest (I grew up wandering around woods for hours at a time), and love watching the antics of the local Colobus monkeys, Sykes monkeys, and even the baboons.

As far as how you can pray for us, you can pray for the following:  1) A support worker; 2) respite for Roger and me; 3) peace in Chloe’s heart and soul and mind; 4) the medical/mental/spiritual/emotional support our family needs; 5) transitions to end sooner rather than later; 6) parental patience; 7) acceptance of Chloe by the community; 8) comfort as our second daughter is getting married in May and, though we will be there for the wedding, we can’t participate in the festivities the way we could if we were there…and we have to leave Chloe behind with hired help. Please pray for them and for her. She struggles mightily with abandonment issues and Mama’s heart hurts deeply for her; 9) Adoption to open up; 10) For me to find a quiet place to work on my art…a past-time I discovered last August that really helps me cope.

Thank you all,
Love,
Julie Tate

CONTACT INFO

Roger & Julie Tate
P.O. Box 96
Kitale, Kenya 30200
rojuta@gmail.com

For ministry donations:
Pastor George Sledd, Treasurer of BFM
P.O. Box 471280 | Lake Monroe, FL 32747-1280
or click here to donate to BFM online.